caldwell pics

with fathers day last weekend and the anniversary of my dads passing in a week or so i find myself thinking a lot about him this time of year. since its ben ten years since he died i think a lot about the past, what things were like for me and in my family at that time. it was not a good time for us then, any of us really. so over the years its been a lot of grief and saddness which over time has healed little by little to where i think more about the happy times than the sad ones. they say time heals and i think that is true if i am open to the healing and forgiveness. now the sadness i feel is about not having my dad here to know my boys, and for them to not know him. of course i want him for me too. its interesting how the pain/grief/saddness whatever you want to call it has changed over the years. it is also interesting how sometimes it can hurt almost like it did at the beginning. so mike fixed (well he said it wasn't broken) the scanner so i uploaded some of my favorite photos i have of my dad. enjoy!

surfside beach

mason and his buddy caeden taking a break

braving the water like big boys, holding hands, too cute....

yes that is my child trying to drink saltwater

look at how blue the water is!!!!! NO this is NOT florida! wow....

We had so much fun on our trip a couple of weeks ago. i thought it was going to be ruined b/c when we got there the mosquitos were RIDICULOUS!! luckily they sprayed friday night and all was right with the world. the water and weather were insanely beautiful. mike got to do some fishing and stogie smoking and we all had fun playing on the beach. our friends the andersons came to hang out on sunday and the boys had a blast swimming and making sand castles. we were so suprised to see how clear and clean the water was. standing in waist deep water you can see your feet. unbelievable. i forget how lucky i am to live so close to the ocean.

we have had a great summer so far. we have spent a lot of time at the pool. mason is really getting more and more comfortable in the water and is learning to swim better on his own. stephen is FEARLESS and loves it - a little healthy fear would be nice :) i am adjusting to having the boys home without my normal 2 day a week break (thank you preschool & MDO) last week was a little hairy. i was tired & grumpy and really struggling with a bad attitude. MUCH better the last several days. thank god, i was really getting tired of hearing myself complain. i'm finding it increasingly difficult to consistently blog, not because there is a lack of fabulous things that the children do. i think i'm just fealing lazzzzyyyyy....

summer, again?

hello summer 2009. although we've had a couple of "cold fronts" come through its sure is getting hot, right? although i do have to give mother nature credit, its been pretty nice having the highs be in the 80's.
school ended last week for both of the boys so we have 3 fun-filled months ahead. not that we have a lot going on, our only big thing is going to see mom in canada at the end of july which i am really looking forward to. i know the boys are going to have a blast and its been since when i was pregnant with mason that i went to visit them. (i know, i suck as a daughter) so we've started the summer off with haircuts, i know UBER exciting stuff.....i don't know where my little 18 month old baby has gone, he looks like such a big boy now. sniff.

and the end of the school year wouldn't be what it is without the annual SMMS year end program. its so cool that mason will actually go onstage without whining, crying, running, etc. AND he SANG some! can't wait to see what its like next year .


Mason and his buddy ryan

so stephen is 18 months old. his favorite word is NO. go figure..... he LOVES books. almost to an annoying degree. he wants to be read to all the time. which is great, really. sometimes i just. don't. want. to.
mason i think has grown like 2 feet an as many weeks. i have also been noticing some emotional maturity in him (which i am sure i will eradicate over the next 3 months!!!)
so basically my kids ROCK. i have been so enjoying spending time with my family lately. that is such a good feeling. sometimes i can go through periods of time, long periods of time, when i just don't feel connected like this. things are good!

Mothers Day

mothers day was last weekend. the fam and i went to smithville for a long weekend. mike rented a cabin on the colorado river. it was a MUCH needed vacation. mike just wrapped up another semester and with work, school & the halfway house he has been really busy. the boys really enjoyed having him to themselves with no interruptions. and everyone got along, even the grownups :)

we hung out, went fishing, swam, hunted grasshoppers, made smores, and were just lazy together. thanks honey for a FABULOUS weekend! i put more pics up on facebook b/c its easier to upload there.

new do

i haven't written in awhile. hello, state the obvious. last week i was dealing with a sick kid and husband. stephen had the ear infection and continued to run a fever for several day after starting antibiotics. then i noticed a couple of sores on his tongue, we thought it was hand, foot and mouth disease. but it turned out the little girl in his class that we thought he got it from didn't have the hand, foot & mouth, but some other weird thing. long story short, too late, he's better now. mike in the meantime got sick as well with whatever stevo had b/c he had swollen gums & a huge sore on his tongue. he's better (thank god) i love you honey. but am i right when i say that men are such babies when they are sick? can i get an amen? amen.
during the sick kid/husband drama i managed to get into a car wreck in the parking lot of stephens school. good times. it was my fault. damn suv drivers that try to call their pediatricians office & then proceed to reverse from their parking spot without looking in their rearview. all i can say is thank GOD that the family was in their car and not on foot!! so needless to say i have heeded the warning and am paying better attention while driving.
i am oh so completely bummed out this week. an acquaintance of mines daughter passed away on monday. Dylan was just over four years old and has been battling a brain tumor since she was 6 months old. i only met her a few times, so we were not close, but i am so sad for her family. for her. that she didn't get to grow up and live life. didn't get to go to school, learn to swim, dance ballet, fall in love, see her baby sisters grow up. her parents seem so strong, so connect with God and Jesus. i am in awe of their grace. the second thing that has my tummy in knots is about my friend Michelle. her third son, Rhyder, is due in september. they have found out through a series of tests that he has trisomy 18. they are 99% sure about this. this is where there is an extra 18th chromosome, so instead of there being 2 there are 3. here is a link that has more info on it if you are curious: http://www.trisomy18.org/site/PageServer?pagename=whatisT18_whatis. so for a lack of better words, this sucks. please pray for her, her baby, and her family. michelle and dave are such lovely people. kind, loving, present, compassionate, REAL. REALLY real. i am so blessed to have met them a little over a year ago.

p.s.

yeah.... i had masons dr look into my ear, and i have a hole in my eardrum (this is from stephen banging me in the ear last week) i was instructed to go to an ent immediately so that they can track my healing progress, or fix if it does not heal. so i am not completely paranoid, it was as bad as i thought. obviously not bad enough that i've rushed to the dr yet. yes mom, i will make an appt.....