well, hello!

5 months later.....

mason completed his first part of kinder and turned 6, has started reading and getting really good at addition and subtraction. he played another season of soccer and has just recently begun in basketballl, which he loves. he is such a kind, attentive, protective big brother, it is AmAzInG! he likes to build things with legos, mostly ships, role play star wars games, run around outside and play his gameboy (which is a total pain in the ass and i highly recommend not allowing your child to have a gaming device until he/she is older)

stephen has settled into being quite the 3 year old, meaning he is stubborn stubborn stubborn and smart smart smart. he has gotten to be such a big boy. he has been potty trained for months now, except for at night. he also is out of the crib. he goes to mothers day out at our church two days a week and loves it (even though he says he doesn't) when he is home with nicky and i he is a good little helper and buddy. he is starting gymnastics next week which i think will be fun and will help him with his balance and coordination. the most frustrating thing about him is that he likes to wake up around 5:30, yes... A.M.!! and although mike generally gets up with him its killing. me. the cutest thing about him, or one of them, is that he hates kisses. he always wipes them off. always.

nicholas will be turning 1 in two days. i cannot believe it. he started walking a few weeks ago and is really getting good at it :) he LOVES to eat and one of his favorite words is "more" which means more food right now mommy. we are still breastfeeding as well. he has gone back to waking me a good one to two times a night. i have not had consistent good nights of sleep in over three years, and i am over it :) when i stop nursing we will have to sleep train i'm afraid. he says mama, dada, ball, more, he also says what we have deciphered as brother. he waves, claps, plays peek-a-boo, stands up on his own. he is so freaking cute with his whispy hair and gapped tooth full face smiles :) he is easygoing, but definitely has some opinions aboout things. he too has started at the church school on tuesdays and thursdays, which he loves! he is in the same room as when we go to church so he was comfortable from the beginning and they said it has been like he has been there all year.


mike has been at his new counseling job at HRC for 6 months and applied and been accepted to the MSW program at Our Lady of the Lake University. he starts in September, it is an 18 months advanced standing program. i am so proud. Freedom House has been rocking and rolling, our census has been down the last couple of months but we made it to our second anniversary of being open in december. we celebrated our EIGHTH wedding anniversary this month. after eight years i love my husband, he is my best friend and i couldn't ask for a better partner in this world. at the end of the day the little things that make me want to ring his neck are just that...little things. i feel so free to be who i am, whoever that is, free to follow my heart, persue my dreams, do what i need to do to take care of myself even if that makes things more burdensome for him. i love you babe, even more than i did when we decided to start this life.

I am starting at the University of Houston Clear Lake next week and for the first time in almost 10 years will be setting foot in a classroom. I am a little nervous about finding the balance with school/work/family/myself but am sure that it will happen. Freedon House for Women opened up in June, after almost five months i thought we would have to shut down but we have built up some residents and things are going well. i feel very blessed to be a part of whats happening over there. a year ago today i was almost a week overdue with nicky and could not wait to get that baby out. time goes so fast. a part of me is sad that the days of me having little babies is coming to an end but really i look forward to the next chapters in our lives.

we had our first holiday season as a family of five, and it was awesome, from halloween to christmas! mike and i often lay in bed and talk about how incredibly wonderful our three boys are. i do not have the words to express my gratitude to the creator of all of this. although i have many moments of almost unendurable frustration and hopelesness, my children and husband challenge me so much and force me to continue to grow and seek love.

pics

after mikes graduation we went to galveston for a mini-vacay. the boys got to do some fishing and we hit up moody gardens. it was a good time, except for mike getting sick and us coming home early...

here are my monkeys after getting their summer buzz cuts. it has been so nice to not brush hair the last 3 months (not that i did that a whole lot any way...)

cousin mariam

my sister becky and my gloriously-wonderful-ab-fab niece came for a visit this summer. it was so awesome getting to see both of them. oh bertie...how much i love you and how grateful i am that you are my sistah and friend (move back here already). her daughter is super sweet....laid back and smart. she really went with the flow and had fun with her crazy-wild boy cousins. we went to the zoo, did some naked-booty swimming (the children that is) and just hund out.

i do realize that i don't have any pictures with mason here.....

summertime....

i have a love/hate relationship with summer. things i love: lazy mornings and staying in pj's until 10:00, having the boys with me all day, no schedule, the spray park, the pool. things i don't love so much: the heat, no school, me straining to entertain my children on a daily basis (the day pretty much starts out with "what are we doing today mommy?"), the boys fighting...a lot!

as summer comes to an end i feel.....sad. mason starts kindergarden monday. and although he was in daycare his first 3 years and then in preschool for the last 2, i am nervous about this. he is like me, he doesn't like change. he is sensitive and actually pretty shy. i know he will be ok, but i am already worrying about what it's going to be like. what if kids are mean to him? what if he's mean to other kids? what if his teacher is a nasty old hag? what if he has trouble? i just can't believe we are already here. so this is where it starts, the letting go (i know he's 5....maybe i'm being a tad dramatic?) and trusting that my babies will be taken care of even when i'm not around.

stephen is a complete ham-hock. he is definitley 2 years old....but so much different than what mason was like. he gets mad and has "tantrums" but nothing like it was with mason. i wonder often how much of that is their nature and how much is my perspective and attitude. he just doesn't take things as seriously. he is doing good in his big boy undies and has finally started trying to go number two in the potty! woo-hoo!

nicholas....nicky...nick-nick....is AwEsOmE! what a cool little man. he is super layed back and fun. he loves to watch his brothers run around and is definitely ready to get in on the action. he will be 7 months old tomorrow. he has started crawling, working on sitting up by himself, and has started eating pureed food. he is also experimenting with consanants, so far m's and b's. he is super sweet and snuggly. how has my baby gotten so big already?

oh the places you'll go

it has been a really busy few weeks around here. many exciting things have happened and are happening.
one being TADA.... mike graduated from college last weekend with his BSW! i am so proud, he has worked so hard and it is quite an achievement. the balance of school, work, and family is no small feat...but he has pulled it off and is finished....(at least until he applies for, and starts, the MSW program at Baylor next summer!)
another fantastically exciting/stressful thing is that we are opening our second sober living house on the 1st of June. freedom house for women...you can see our website if you are interested in what both houses are like: www.houstonfreedomhouse.com.
since it is a womans house i will be running it, which i am a little nervous about because, well thats just how i am, but also i'm anxious about finding my balance. i am taking 2 summer classes online, 2 in the fall and then should be able to transfer to UH in the spring. (not to mention my three little moneys!)
i am so grateful for all of the wonderful things that god has planned for us....and i think we're just getting started!

some april pics

nic coo-ing

this was taken yesterday. nicholas is almost 7 weeks old.

nic pics

welcome nicholas buchanan!

four weeks ago today i was going into labor. i will eventually make myself type out his birth story but for now just want to post some pics of our newest addition.

he was born on january 17th at 3:14 a.m. (although his birth certificate says 2:55 a.m - more will be revealed on that when i tell his story) he was 7 pounds 12 oz and 20 1/2 inches long.

we are doing well. the boys are awesome with him. so loving and gentle and all around excited to have another brother. it seems the change has manifested itself with them fighting amongst themselves more, oh and with us too! stephen all of a sudden seems VERY two years old. but alas, he is just that! the lack of sleep is starting to catch up to me (us) almost a month later so i feel tired. but overall pretty good. the first few days postpardum were awful. awful. i felt physically ill with what i can only describe as the feeling of being homesick. but the hormonal insanity passed after about a week and has not really returned. we are trying to learn how to balance life with three children which can be pretty frustrating and overwhelming. i'm just trying to let myself make it today. i know that sooner than later this will all be old hat.

forty weeks and one day prenant

thats what the ticker says at the top of my blog. i would love to say that the last week has been one of great excitement and peace, me just enjoying being pregnant for the last time getting ready to become a family of five. but in truth it has been very difficult. i have never had such raging hormones, i have felt like a complete nut job and been acting like it. i have been filled with alot of doubt, i am tired, my body hurts and all three of the boys came down with the flu. i had this expectation i think that a) the baby would come a week before i was due, not AFTER and b) that since mike is home these days that i would be able to selfishly take care of myself, not worry about the kids, cooking, etc. it has not worked out that way, and although i have the perspective that this will be over soon, at least i am not sick, etc...etc... my FEELINGS have been out of control. i have been feeling very alone, which is in no way based in reality. i have gotten so many calls/emails/messages asking how i am and offering help. the problem is i am really bad at accepting/asking for it when i do need it. and instead of focusing on all of the love surrounding me, i see the negative. which really is just such a part of my personality, but with awareness comes the capacity for change so there is hope for me yet. i have been having these frequent angel/devil conversations with myself over the last several days and quite frankly am very sick of, well...me!
so my due date was yesterday which means that nicholas will indeed be here very soon. the boys have been without fever since yesterday afternoon so when i do go into labor i don't have to worry about my children possibly infecting the children of those that i love. there's is not much more physical planning i can do (other than rest, ha!) i'm keeping laundry clean, food in the pantry, bag is packed, carseats are in. its just the waiting game. today has been a better day i think because an end is in sight in regards to the sickness of my family.
i cannot wait to meet this little guy. i wonder what he will look like? what will it be like to feel the birth of my son as i never have before? to be a mom three times over? three times, what a blessing. i wonder how i got here, how i have the priveledge of being the mommy to three little boys? i cannot wait to see how stephen is as a big brother, what he will think of this baby. to see mason with his new little brother, he is going to be amazing. pretty much every day he says maybe the baby will come tomorrow morning mom. and he says hello to baby nicholas in my belly alot.
so..... he is not here yet, but hopefully soon! birth announcement to follow!!!

12 days and counting

i am due in twelve days. twelve. this has been, by far, the easist pregnancy out of the three. maybe because i was in such good shape when i got preggo. (keyword: WAS!) as good as i've been feeling i AM tired, my body DOES hurt and i am a TAD cranky. mostly i am really excited and anxious to meet this little man and to see how he will change our family dynamic. i've been feeling a little sad too thinking about that, how stephen won't be my littlest baby anymore and how mason will have that much more responsibility as the big brother. also this will be our last baby, unless the powers that be have other plans. i'm looking forward to trying to live in the moment and enjoy the baby time as much as possible.
i am also a little excited about the future and some plans i've been making in my head, regarding going back to school and things like that. more will be revealed on that :)
stephen DESPERATELY wants to be potty trained! he has been taking off his own diaper and going potty in his little potty all by himself. as fantastic as that is, its a little difficult because i am not in a position right now to take a few days and do the deal. i want to wait until after the baby is born and do it this summer. its pretty great though to watch his independence and self sufficiency grow.
i probably won't blog again until after baby has made his arrival. so next time i'll have a birth announcement!

ho ho ho

we really had a great christmas this year. one of the best parts has been that mike has been home so much over the last few weeks so we really have been able to spend a lot of good family time together. on christmas eve we had our friends the levits over and mikes brother kelly and his wife dmitri. we cooked up a big ole yummy bird and had sweet potato, butternut squash & pecan pie for dessert. the kids ran around and played (happily) and the adults got to relax and enjoy ourselves. santa did make it by our house this year, and really enjoyed the milk & cookies we left. the boys were so excited to wake up and see what presents were left for them. we made homemade monkey bread, yum!, and fried bacon, of course! i realize that i am talking about food a lot here, that is because not only are we big eaters around here, but one of my most favorite things is cooking with my husband. i really enjoy working side by side with him. later in the morning we went over to mimis house and had a visit with her and mikes sister leila who was in town from arizona.

shalom everyone!

choo choo

here are some pics from a little train ride we went on down in alvin before christmas. it was a neat little place that had some live christmas tunes and kettle corn. the boys LOVED it!

merry merry

it snowed this past friday on the 4th. it was AmAzInG!!! for me anyway! it has snowed five times in my lifetime, 3 of which have been in the last five years. i have never gotten to experience it actually snowing. it started to sleet here around 7:30, turned into the real deal around 9 and went all day long until about 4:00! mike had taken mason in to school but we picked him up around 10:30 so he could enjoy it with us. we didn't spend too much time outside because we live in houston and do not have appropriate cold weather clothes. it was super awesome, the boys loved it. although i think i was the most excited out of all of us!

party time

to celebrate the boys bdays we had a party at the casa. mike grilled burgers and the kids jumped on the moonwalk and ran around. it was a lot of fun and the boys had a blast! i did not take many photos, but here are a couple.

Happy 5th Mason Owen!

Mason turned five on november 19th. FIVE!FIVE!FIVE! i have no idea how we got here, but glad i've made it (so far)! We celebrated by eating ice cream sundaes with one of his favorite candies thrown in, gummie worms. mmmmMMMMmmmm......MMMMMmmmmMMMMM.....
i cannot believe my baby is five. along with continuing to be one of the hard-headest children, well people, i've ever known (and attitudinal as well) he is so funny and kind and smart. he is really getting the knack with letters and is starting to learn how to read a bit! he LOVES all things science/nature/animals. he loves to know things and to talk about those things. oh mason, you are so much like your mamma and i wonder if i will ever learn how to not butt heads with you? i love you i love you i love you and i am so glad that you are mine :)

happy second birthday stevie c

i'm a week late on this post as his bday was last saturday. did i mention that i was not even in town for said bday?? so we celebrated when i got home on sunday evening, my fabulous hubby made a cake! i cannot believe its been two years since he was born. he has gotten so big and is no longer the baby that he was. to me he still seems like it. even through the words, the independence, the attitude. hes still that little guy that we brought home that i could not hold enough, rock enough, kiss enough. he is definitley not mommys little boy anymore, has taken alot more to his dad. (he finally realized that dad is the fun one!)
i love you stephen. you are such an amazing joy in my life, our lives. you fill my heart up. you are soo goofy and smart and silly.

ms mariam

i went for a visit last week to see my sister becky and my fantabulous niece mariam. i had such a great time hanging out with my sister and holding her beautiful baby! mason kept asking me what i did while i was away (i went for 4 nights) and really all i could say was hang out and hold the baby. it was nice to not have to run around two little boys creating havoc!!
she is super cute and really a calm baby (lucky you sis, lucky you!) i didn't take as many pics as i should have but here are a couple. also big sister kate was coming for a visit as well and luckily we got to overlap for a day so the three of us could be together, which hasn't happened in, wow, a long time. i can't even remember! enjoy the cuteness!

i think i forgot to mention how freaking cute this town is that they live in. its about 20 minutes west of charlotte and has the quaintest little main street. LOVE it!