oh baby oh baby....oh baby

i started this post a few weeks ago and am finally wiling to share it. so the big news is that i am pregnant. yes, again. yes, with number three. yes, i am crazy. mike says he will hold me solely responsible for whatever chaos ensues as a result of having another child. we are super excited! i am anywhere from 9ish to 11ish weeks along, which puts me due sometime in january or february. i will know more definitively next friday once i have a more high-def ultrasound. we went monday to our first appointment with the midwife group. (which is a change i am going with on this pregnancy. i have done the "dr. route" twice before, both times induced, both times with an epidural. i am looking for a completely different birth experience) so she was AWESOME. she did do an ultrasound and i never cease to be amazed at how much they form so quickly. it was low-resolution so she couldn't say for sure how far along i am. but we got to see/hear babys heart beat and he/she was SO active. below are some notes i've made over the last couple of weeks:
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because i know i'll forget if i don't write it down. because, yes, i have PREGNANCY BRAIN..... ALREADY!!! YAY!!!!!!

i think one of the reasons why i have not been blogging is because i have had this super big news that we weren't sharing yet so most of what i have to say is related to that and would have given away my current status. like "i'm tired, i feel like i'm going to puke, i'm tired, my back hurts, i am worried something bad will happen with this pregnancy, i'm tired" ...etc....

we found out we were expecting again of course immediately because we have been trying. well and when i say trying i mean i got my iud taken out in april and we conceived within a month. man, we sure can make kids! so its a long road from conception to a comfortable time to share the news with the world.

i took my preggo test on memorial day and got an immediate verification to something i was pretty sure about, i was already feeling tired and light headed so was pretty sure. we told mason that afternoon and he was so excited. he has been saying he wants another baby, a sister to be precise. so i asked him what he would say if i told him there was a baby in my belly and he said "cool" so i said "well, there is a baby in my belly" and he looked up at me and smiled really big and said "nuh-uh" and i said uh-huh. and he said something along the lines of awesome. since then he asks me if the baby is moving yet, is the baby coming soon, will rub my belly, etc. i am so looking forward to this journey with him because he is old enough to GET what is happening, and can experience it with us. to add on to this thought last week we were laying in bed and mason asked where the baby came from. now we have had conversations about how babies are made, that they are in mammas belly, etc. but he has never asked such DETAILED quiestions. he wanted to know how baby will come out of my belly. so i told him. he looked very thoughtful and said "but it is so small" and i told him yes dear it is small but it stretches when baby comes. he did a little butthead laugh from beavis & butthead and said "unbelievable". yes, unbelievable.

i have not been to the midwives yet so am not sure when my due date is. it will either be in january or febuary (long story as to why i'm not sure but has to do with iud removal and questionable ovulation) so i am either at 6 or 9 weeks and have already gained 5 pounds. argh. i have not been going to the gym because, well i'm tired and don't want to. i can see the battle is already in progress. i keep telling myself when the boys go back to school in august it will be easier to go. we'll see, we'll see.

PREGGO OBSERVATIONS:

#1 i have a certain way i apparently like to sleep when pregnant as it started almost immediately again this time. on side, top leg thrown over, snuggling pillow. while not pregnant this makes my back hurt, but is sooo the way i sleep knocked up. (wow, knocked up. that was charming)

#2 i am a man hater at the moment. i am reading these books that are based in the middle ages and all of the fictional-yet-based-on-truth truths about women have been really pissing me off. really. even though i know its 2009 people but.... anyway. my hormones are being channeled into being pissed off.

#3 i cannot live without coffee. but though pre-pregnancy i drank it cold with a splash of milk and agave the thought of that makes me want to puke. so now its warm with a bunch of milk and sugar. weird.

#4 i am mean. to my huband. at night.

day 2 & gratitude friday

stephen survived his second day of mothers day out, they said he did better than on tuesday. when we were walking into the building and he saw the silly old lady with reindeer antlers on he remembered where he was and started crying. break my heart. he loved going on the buggy ride & he got to see a handbell choir. again i have to reiterate how quickly 5 hours goes by. for me, probably not so much for him.

well, not even a week open & one out of our two clients has already burned off. mike was with him yesterday morning at the house & he seemed fine, then didn't show up in the evening. this is the guy that mike has known for years. cunning, baffling, powerful. it never ceases to amaze me what this disease does to people. again it reiterates to me how much easier it is to stay sober than get sober. i am SO grateful to be where i am today. what are you grateful for?

on a side note in regards to addiction, i have been having thoughts of smoking again (because i'm a nut job! and yes i'm still nursing. shut up) but last night i got new resolve.

i love my kids. they are awesome. stephen has been more chatty lately. he LOVES to say ball, dada, drink, that, cup. now keep in mind this is largely in the language that only mommy & daddy can understand. except for ball. thats clear as day. mason uses words like frustrated, object (in regards to game playing), and now i can't think of them. but often he says things and i'm like, how old are you kid?

my superhero

dewberry farm

we went on our annual trip to the farm with masons school. it was a long day, but fun for the kids. last year i was 9 months preggers on this trip and mason melted-down repeatedly, it was too much for him to have his worlds colliding (mommy & ms. olga at the same time?!?) this year was better, just when it gets to be 11:00 & he hasn't eaten since breakfast it gets a little hairy. glad i went, glad i don't have to go back for a year!

now i've realized that halloween is in one week and we have not picked a pumpkin for carving purposes. when we went to the pumpkin patch in the beginning of the month i thought, hey, i have a whole month. man, time sure does fly when you're having fun. (or sick and counting the minutes till beddtime)

bye bye green blankie

my oh so big boy said goodbye to his favorite blanket today. it has been his most favorite thing for the last two years, before green blanket there was blue blanket (blue was lost when mason threw it out of the window two years ago in a fit driving down eldridge)

it was time to let go, green had all of the edges ripped off and was slowly forming hole after hole. it really had turned into a holey scarf that he would wrap around his neck while he slept.

so i have mentioned to him a couple of times lately that it will be time to say goodbye soon. he comes downstairs this a.m. and says:

"daddy, i'm ready to throw my blanket away now" and he did it. no tears and no regrets, so far.

been awhile

its been awhile since i've posted because, well, having two children at home is work man.

the kids are doing great. me, i have my moments, but doing well.

stephen is getting so big. he's been working on sitting up and been saying "gah" & "gak". he's more effecient at rolling to get around, still no signs of intentions to crawl. mason was the same way, he never properly crawled even, just the army drag.

mason is a character. his imagination gets more vivid every day. he started gymnastics two weeks ago and really seems to like it. i've had him out of swim lessons, although we've been going to the pool, since may but he starts back up in july.

we've been having a good time, although some days are, as mike would say, all about passing time. which sounds kind of bad but hey lets face it, some days are like survival.

thats all for now...

smores

the boys attempted camping at lake livingston this weekend. they went with our friend eddie and his son sawyer, who is 4 1/2. they had a FABULOUS time on friday afternoon and evening. the boys went fishing for the first time and both caught their first fish!

unfortunately mason had a really rough night and they had to come home early early saturday morning. they'll try again another time.

mommy enjoyed her night to herself friday, well with stephen too! my friends jonathan & sarah took me to dinner to celebrate my b-day (okay it took us awhile to get it together, as my bday was in april!!) it was nice to be served dinner and to only have to worry about 1 child.

stephen is 6 months old

i cannot believe that he has already been here for 6 months. it feels like just yesterday that he was born, but also that he has always been in my life. we went for his checkup, little man has not even gained a pound in 2 months, yet has grown over 2 inches taller. i was not suprised about his height but very much so about his weight. since we are starting solids twice a day now i think his weight should catch up some. he enjoys hanging out with his brother, rolling around on the floor and most of all kicking his legs. he has four teeth now and, oh, he likes to give kisses, which can sometimes be in the form of biting your face - hard! he is awesome, thats really the best word for him.

mason is doing well, only two more weeks until summer vacation! i've got a lot of fun stuff planned, it will be nice to have him around every day. we went over to a friends house today after school and he jumped on a trampoline for the first time - and loved it of course. i love that he already has playmates that he gets to spend time with outside of school. i can't say enough how i love being home with the kiddos - now if i can just figure out how to get the house cleaned every week that would be good!

mothers day is sunday and we are going to go check out a farmers market where you can go strawberry picking - we hear there is fabulous inexpensive produce, as well. mikes mom and possibly his brother will be joining us, its always good to be around family.

Mason Owen

turned 3 on November 19th. they say that the "terrible two's" is really just preparation for 3, i am a believer.
with that being said he is awesome, what can i say really. he is hysterical, he is such a joy to share life with. so smart and fun (and stubborn and impatient) ....
he LOVES HIS baby!! i completely underestimated him, thought he would be jealous and angry with stephen. quite the opposite, he loves to hug him and give him kisses. i am so proud.....
i really could go on and on about how god has blessed me and michael, but i'll stop here before my hormones take us to the point of no return with cheesy-ness.